Tickety tock, the ball dropped, and with the ringing in of both a new year and a new decade, the pressure doubled to make a promise to do something that will make your life and yourself better.

So, what did you do?

What did you promise?

And let’s be honest, have you already abandoned your new year’s resolution?

Don’t fret. You’re not alone.

Perhaps, though, it’s time you take a deeper look at why you’re ghosting (abandoning) your new year’s resolutions and what you can do to stop ghosting and start succeeding at achieving your goals.

Spoiler Alert: Hold onto your party whistle, I have a confession to make. I’m probably the most unmoved “new year’s” person on the planet. The holiday does nothing for me and never has. At least not in the traditional sense of how it’s celebrated. But . . . once I realized that, it was the answer to why my resolutions got ghosted.

I Wasn’t Always a (New Year’s Eve) Party Pooper

I’ve been to the parties.

Really.

I’ve dressed up. I’ve showed up. I donned all the appropriate party bells and whistles. I sang. I danced. I was as loud and obnoxious as the rest of the people at these events. At the stroke of midnight I (sometimes silently, sometimes aloud) promised to do something magnificent in the year ahead. Oh, yeah, this was it. This was the year I was going to become the most awesome version of myself.

And then I woke up the next day feeling crappy. Empty. Sometimes even sad.

What was wrong with me?

Talk about a party pooper.

Actually, I’m a realist. And there was nothing real or productive about New Year’s promises that fit my realist profile.

I’d felt like I’d wasted time.

And I don’t waste time.

Nah-huh

This Thing Called Time

Astrologically speaking, the year always begins in the sign of Capricorn. Capricorn rules career, business and time. They are utilitarians (utilize all resources). They rule structure, discipline and reaching the summit. They are focused, driven and serious.

To me a new year is no more important or opportune than a new day, a new month, a new decade, or for that matter, a new minute. It’s probably also why traditional New Year ’s Eve promising (resoluting) never resonated with me . . . because I’m a Capricorn.

Fool-ish-ness. To me. Even as a teen. A waste of time and energy.

Time is time. And every bit of it is important.

So why, oh New Year’s Guru, why do we pressure ourselves yearly on December 31^st to promise things that research shows we don’t live up to?

Who thought of this idea anyway?

My sincere apologies to those of you who love New Year’s Eve. Party your party hat off and do everything to invigorate your soul. But please, wait until long after the midnight madness has ended to set your yearly intentions.

Do You Intend or Resolute?

So how can we best use our time (today, this year, this decade) to pursue a personal and professional life that will bring us what we really want . . . happiness!

The difference in success may be the difference between a resolution and an intention.

Do you “intend” or “resolute”? And how is it working out for you so far?

res·o·lu·tion
/ˌrezəˈlo͞oSH(ə)n/
noun
1. a firm decision to do or not to do something.

in·ten·tion
/inˈten(t)SH(ə)n/
noun
1. a thing intended; an aim or plan. (a/k/a > a goal with a plan)

Instead of starting the new year and the new decade off with a firm promise to do something, trying setting a (general) intention in the area of your goal.

In talking with people, I’ve discovered four major goal-oriented areas. In no particular order, they are:

• • • • Health
      • Wealth
      • Career
      • Relationships

But if at the stroke of midnight new year’s eve you made (aloud or silently) the obligatory, adrenaline-induced promise to lose weight, join a gym, get healthy, find that perfect romantic partner, polish up and send off resumes, land your dream job and be on your financial way, you have set yourself up for failure (but you probably knew that as you were saying it)

Set an Intention

So, what are you aiming for? Choose one goal category (listed above or your own) and set a clear intention about how you are going to accomplish that goal.

For example, instead of saying “I am going to get the job of my dreams this year” make an intention to focus on getting clear as to what your dream job is and what you need to do to get it.

Then make a plan to make that goal happen.

Ask yourself things like:

• • • What is it I would really like as a dream job/career?
    • Do I need further education or training for it?
    • If so, what do I need and how can I go about getting it?
    • If not, what steps can I take to get that job/career?

If you set an intention around something and take strategic steps at achieving it, you are more likely not to abandon your goal and you are more likely to succeed at achieving it.

Setting an intention includes defining a desired goal and setting up a plan to achieve it. A resolution is a decision to do or not do something. Leave the empty promises in the year that passed. Move forward into the new year and the new decade with a set of intentions. You’re more likely to reach the summit that way.

Psst – Don’t Forget
Don’t forget to always remember that the voice of fear will whisper in your ear attempting to steer you from achieving your goals. Silence the voice by telling it that you matter. You were put here for a purpose and you INTEND to . . . figure it out and achieve it.

Conversation Starters:

1. Do you like New Year’s Eve parties?
2. Have you ever lived up to a past New Year ’s Eve resolution?
3. What is one area of your life you want to set an intention to accomplish something in?